Me, Too: Women and their Power Emerge


Me, too: Women and their Power emerge provoking a dynamic that is just now underway.  Fifty-three years ago, women gained the right to engage, speak, represent themselves and their sisters for living life on their terms; In 1964, the Civil Rights Act gave the basis for Women’s Rights, and in 1964, Reproductive Rights were gained by women. The shift in consciousness that made for the sexual liberation to unfold has now hit a place of power as women speak.  Sometimes decades ago, sometimes months ago, the abuse and insult of sexual exploitation is being revealed.  We are watching the pillars fall from a building that remained impervious to change until these women spoke up.  The transformation of men and women to achieve dignity and integrity around their sexuality has been a struggle hard won but has hit a wall that needed hitting, hurled a hall of mirrors to hypocrisy on a level that is not even come to its crest.  It’s just the beginning of the tolerance and denial that held sexism, just as it has held racism, in place.  Why now?  We all sat through the assertions by women about Trump, we all watched Matt Lauer directly disrespect Hillary Clinton, we’ve tolerated as if it were someone else’s job to deal with it, the unfinished, rather repulsive tail of sexual behavior far from the goal of sexual liberation and sexual equality.  This  disruption of  the status quo in many quarters previously denied is now full on.  Me, too took us all from resignation to stirring what we always knew but never spoke of.  The Power of women, to speak, to stand, to represent and to shoulder the burden women have endured is here.

Mary Beard, author of Women & Power: A Manifesto asks that we interrogate our notions of power, and look into why  and how women are excluded, minimized.  That power has been defined by how it is expressed by men is not how women can direct their power is suggested by her views given in NY Times Book Review by Parul Sehgal 12/6/27.

” By looking at the conceptions of how we hold authority, mastery and even knowledge is inflected by gender.  You cannot easily fit women into a structure that is already coded as male; you have to change the structure,” Beard writes.  She points to the three women who founded Black Lives Matter:  Alicia Garza, Patrisse Cullors and Opal Tometi for their promoting “decentralized leadership” emphasizing the movement over personalities.  “These three women are decoupling power from public prestige, transforming it from a possession one can seize to an attribute to be shared. ”

Women giving authority and trust to other women is one aspect of the transition that is being called for, and clearly Mary Beard has a contribution to make to women in recognizing what it is that gives a basis for power, and its expression in the world.


Wise Women Know and say NO


Wise woman know and say NO to repeal of ACA.  Hell No.  That is exactly what the following Republican congressional members have done.  Representative Shelly Moore Capito’s no vote, and Republican  Susan Collins, Republican Senators for Maine, & Lisa Murkoski have all publicly expressed their no to the repeal.  They will not vote against ACA with no replacement arrived at by congressional meetings.

They demand a negotiated and public work  by congressional meetings that flesh out the potential, the real promises that can be made to the American people.  Senator Barbara Comstock of Virginia, Representatives Jody Hice of Georgia and Ileana Ros-Lehtiner of Florida have all indicated they cannon accept the repeal of the ACA without a health care replacement that covers all Americans in need of coverage.

Democratic congressional members have been vocal all along with the chicanery and bluster of the GOP bully tactics not close to representing the democratic process.  Unfailingly we have heard Senators Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris and Representatives Barbara Lee and Maxine Waters expose the underhanded attempt to bully through the repeal of ACA at the expense of the people who would suffer from losing coverage and losing treatment.

Hurray for these women who have stood tall in their ability to lead as congressional representatives.  Well done.

UPDATE:  John McCain stands tall for stating and remaining committed to saying No to the Repeal without a plan in place to replace the Affordable Health Care.  The work continues and what we see here is democracy at work, and a break in the GOP front that has thwarted forward motion to put aside the repeal, and address the needs of the people to be served.


Woman to Woman: how do we show up?


Woman to Woman: how do we show up is looked at by Marco Cochrane, Burning Man Sculptor and Artis.  He poses the question by his art:  What would it take to have women feel safe? That question has had such an impact on me. And the bigger question, what would it be like for humanity if women felt safe and expressed what hasn’t been expressed, forged the path to a depth of perception and understanding that changed the course of assumptions and givens about how we do this thing called life.

It was a few years ago when Marco came to the Berkeley Impact Hub, and his question provoked some uncomfortable truths.   I now recognize the places I stop. Where I don’t fulfill my communications, limit my investments, withhold my viewpoints-and just ask that question of myself. What I find is opinions of others have been a long standing inner critic, and actually specifically the opinions of other women.  How women judge women is rarely considered, but , if they  exclude one from the tribe, group, community, with a shrug or a cool chill,  it may never come to words but a whole dance has happened.   Without conscious consideration and in a pattern, we often fall back and hide.   Moderating subconsciously to fit in to whatever code of conduct is telegraphed with the slight nuance barely detectable.  Recently a research revealed that being outside the group, the tribe is innately something we dread from our DNA.  Our very survival depends on being part of a tribe, community, family.  So the exclusion risk is experienced on such a deep level that it is barely recognizable.  The view that the risk is so high that we automatically reduce ourselves to acceptable form without even noticing that’s what we’re doing.

Does that experience bend our wills and allow us to shrug off our intention and wisdom?  Sometimes.  WE’re writers, artists, mothers, sisters, volunteer politically, board members, entrepreneurs, community members, dancers-and before I brought that question into my life, I had no idea how much I safeguard, mitigate, tolerate and allow things to pass. Just the question, Marco’s question,  gives me energy and a free space from which to find a whole other voice, a whole other stance, a whole other trust that has never been there that what I’m up to, what I need to say, how I need to respond can be trusted to be of value.

It surely starts with being told as a little girl to settle down, get in line, don’t talk, don’t giggle and don’t skip in the hallways. It is deepened by the moments of being called on by the teacher, haltingly responding and seeing and feeling the snickering in the room. The idea is don’t speak unless you are right. Watch, observe, and be included, be accepted, be a good girl.


Marco Cochrane’s question disturbs the comfort in thinking that things are working out: women have been sexually liberated since the the mid 1960’s.  Women’s Rights and Human Rights are instilled in the culure, and the distance between the potential and what is so towards  sex equality has reduced; we are home free.

But then we watched women of stature, powerful women,  who have earned national respect in achieving elected office and produced results for society that are notable and distinguishable be diminished. They of all of us feel safe, right? Well maybe not.

Yes, it is still a man’s world, as we see in the halls of congress for instance.  Even so sometime women use the same judgements to level the playing field as do the male counterparts.  Certainly,  congress has demonstrated their position as we  watched Hillary Clinton be criticized for everything from her husband, her hair, her choice of clothing, etc. to her character as well.  Women, as well as men, said they just didn’t trust her-giving no discernible reasons offered. Even recently, we have seen newly elected but highly seasoned Senator  Kamala Harris of California interrupted repeatably in a recent hearing on Trump and the Russian intervention in the 2016 Presidential election. The concern and focus might have been on the source of the hearings, the Russians and their hacking, but instead the Chair of the committee  interrupted Senator Harris basically to shush her:  be still and sit down.  Anyone paying attention has seen this with Senator Elizabeth Warren. So our daughters are watching, and a part of our minds are observing and pulling us back from full expression lest we be called hysterical or cold or irrational.

What do you think the world would be like if women felt safe? Where would that show up in your life and your community, and the world?


Feminists or not, the dilemma


Feminists or not,  the dilemma is long standing full of contradictions, mystery and history.  This is a response toLauren Enriquez who wrote and article  in NY Times 2/27/17 Pro-Life, But Left Out in her experience of the Woman’s March 2017.  I offer my experience to you Lauren and to  other women who don’t identify or feel the feminist or not feminist dilemma.   A long standing dilemma for women since the first feminists came along.

My experience was not of a divided group of women, some “feminists” – some not. In fact, the divisions of race and age, and status and income of all the women who assembled was without boundaries as we mixed and engaged to fill the streets with our support of women’s rights and human rights. First, I need to ask? Is Women’s Rights really all about abortion, and why does abortion create an insurmountable chasm in your experience, Lauren?

Consider this: Roe v Wade made evident and overt the terminating of a pregnancy, explicitly defining for medical professionals their liability not being in assistance to women. in the early years of the 20th Century, women had their babies at home with a midwife and family. The same women who helped women with their labor and delivery, helped them with abortifacients to terminate a pregnancy. Doctors did not participate in births unless there was a dire need for their intervention. In the 1920’s and 30’s, hospitals began marketing to women to come to the hospitals to have their babies according to historian Shannon Withycombe who specializes in the history of women’s health at the University of New Mexico. She says that given hospitals were no more sanitary than at home, and since antibiotics had not entered use in the hospitals, hospitals and at room births combined to make for a high mortality in delivery. 70 women in every 1000 died in labor and delivery, but rarely did the women  see any physician or midwife prior to delivery. What really changed the tide that brought women into hospitals for delivery in the 19th and early 20th century was their marketing the promise of pain-free labor with “twilight sleep.” Until the 1960’s, this combination of morphine and amnesiac was predominantly used in hospitals by doctors. In the 1960’s, the quality of birth for the mother and the child was reconsidered. Natural childbirth-drug free with breathing training then became the potential for childbirth in and out of the hospital.

Abortion has a similar history:  prior to Roe v Wade, women were treated by the midwives for delivery, but also to end early pregnancies in such common practice that it wasn’t directly spoken of.  When Roe v Wade came into law of the land, it was the physicians who  gained legal protection in intervening in a pregnancy, as well as the women.  Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Pregnancy center in upstate New York,  kind and compassionate doctors and nurses  were what was available  to women before Roe v Wade in 1973.  But what drove the need for that was the fact that  in 1964,  Civil Rights and birth control pills gave women more power in their lives.  By 1966,  66% of women used birth control.  A huge change was underway in the marriage and family patterns over the next two decades.  Of note is the fact that when Roe v Wade became law of the land, there were already seventeen states that allowed the practice of assisting the termination of unwanted early pregnancies.  Further, as historian Linda Gordon points out”the growing acceptability of sex without marriage made the ban on abortions unacceptable.”  Women achieved “greater safety, lower costs, and greater opportunity in education and employment,”  and as well, they achieved the legal status of purchasing a home and credit as they took on jobs.   Abortion rate from 1972-76 showed that deaths from abortion went from thirty-nine per million to two per million.  Feminism was attributed to Roe v Wade, but its source was actually the legal and medical establishments giving form and legal stand to those who assisted women in their choice of abortion.

Women’s integrity to choose what is right for them does not require group membership, or exclude any woman,  Having your choice and allowing other women to have their choice does not need to come with discrediting, diminishing or holding in contempt those who make different choices.  The Women’s March for me was all about that!   Our concerns, what we marched for was Women’s Rights, Civil Rights and Human Rights and standing together, marching together as women; -some who call themselves feminists, some who don’t.

We are here for each other, for our mothers, for our sisters, for our daughters.  In response to the New Administrations intimidation and threats hurled toward limiting or reducing any aspect of those rights that support the benefit of full inclusion and social equality achieved since the 1960’s, we resist.  We will continue to show up to stand with those in need of support.  That is feminism to most, and you are not excluded.  We are here, Lauren, together we and those who march together will stand with the most vulnerable, and bring ourselves forward together to achieve that.

Peggy Reskin, author of Barefoot Frontrunners: sex, women and power


The Woman’s March 2017: “Check Your Privilege”


The New York Time’s article today on the Women’s March Opens A Raw Dialogue emphasized women coming together to voice and represent nationwide, young and old, a range of interpretations of why women are showing up and marching. There are those who want to represent feminism, women’s rights and civil rights, with a full throated response to the Inaguration of a new President. With him, a new administration that has at the least shown ambiquity and a shift away from the trajectory of civil rights attained by women, the LGBTQ community, children of illegal immigrants, and those who represent the Middle East community within our country. Everyone is invited to this inclusive event. The Woman’s March in cities all around the country, initiated in DC, San Francisco, Oakland, San Diego, Atlanta and many, many cities of the nation is happening on Saturday January 21st, 2017.

The Rise of the Woman – The Rise of the Nation is the context provided by the DC Women’s March. There are meetings and more meetings to make banners that say “He is not My President” and angry disappointed voices that want to initiate and stand against all that the new President-elect has represented over the past election. There is a call for the return to feminism of the 1970’s and engage newly toward the equality that has never been fully represented in our country. There is the “Check Your Privilege” conversation between women of color to the white women as they engage together for the Women’s March in DC. Even as the unmet goals of equality, such as the ERA and the reality of what has not been gained over the years since the social revolution of the 1970’s emerge, there is anxiety about what has been achieved and may be lost in the experience of most of those who are planning to participate in a Women’s March on January 21st across the country. There is the swell of a huge potentially destructive wave collecting anger and confusion as well as mystery in the mix as the Presidential power ends with President Barack Obama, and begins with Donald Trump, and the GOP agenda.

Where will you be January 21st is the question being asked of women friends across the country. My sisters and sisters-in-laws and friends in North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia and DC , and those friends and colleagues around me in the Bay Area are together, even as they are of different mindsets about the election and its results. All have consideration for the fact that a new day is coming, and it is not clear what will be asked of us, but we we must all meet the future with resourcefulness, clear eyes and even open heart. In the voices of all, there is the willingness to stand for what is important to us, as the women of this country. That is what the Woman’s March is about for many of us. Even as it is about Women’s Rights, the fifty-three years process where women filled out the potential of responsibility and choice in how they live their lives, what lies ahead is unclear. A Multigenerational Woman’s Gathering in Marin County was initiated almost immediately after the surprise victory of Trump over Hillary, their agendas could not be further apart on women’s rights and civil rights, and the young women reported panic attacks and huge grief at the news of Trump’s election. The coming together of young professional women who have only known what it is to have those rights, and their voice, juxtaposed to the women who participated in the process of gaining and living out women’s rights from Civil Rights, Birth Control and Roe vs Wade. Each woman, a rich source of attitudes and viewpoints about the challenges ahead, presented perspective onto our role as women given the platform presented by the President Elect over the two years of his campaign.

What we came to was to was the value and responsibility we felt to present our bodies and ourselves in our stand for Women’s Rights are Human Rights. The history of how women came through to their power reveals the fact that through that process, the lesbian and gay community gained access to express and represent, and direct their power. The struggles in race and in sex over the decades have a correlation and powerful mutuality, evidenced in the thread of equality constrained or given access to liberty through the Civil Rights Bill. We can have this Woman’s March represent a new threshold, a new potential. I will be joining my sisters and colleagues and friends in the Woman’s March to represent what we bring to ourselves, each other and the county. What it means to me is that we are united in our stand to move forward, include more diversity and differences to achieve the whole of who we are as a country. What this means to me is we renew our investment and enthusiasm for human rights, measure our stands to correlate with our immense capacity for bringing life and hope to ourselves and the world.

Check our Privilege, not because we are white, but because the real privilege is our ability to speak and bring the best of who we are as a country to the world to meet this new transition. Efforts and gains have been made and we do not want to see them reduced due to political change of who is in office as President: educating law enforcement officers, reducing the prison population, improving the means for better education and opportunity to our children in all zip codes, feeding and caring for the large number of children and seniors: these are the priorities we do not want to see lost or reduced. This is who and what the Women’s March will represent to many of us. This is where we can achieve our greatest victory.



Traumatic Brain Injury: Teri’s story


Traumatic brain injury:  Teri’s story began as it happens to many, from every day events at unexpected times in their lives and leave them floating in a sea of confusion and isolation.    Teri  recalls   the panic and disorientation that fourteen years ago came with her undiagnosed traumatic brain injury. Without the symbolic representation and acquired language that describes our experience, and connects us to others and the world around us, we are lost from our lives, and such is the case with TBI for many. But Teri’s story is very different, and for anyone suffering the effects of a traumatic brain injury, or living with loved ones with that condition, Teri’s story has much to contribute in how she made a recovery that was achieved by her decisions in response to her condition.

Knowing Teri as I have for the past thirteen years, I am only slightly aware of the traumatic experiences that defined her life and limited her participation for many years. We were in a warm and receptive course of study in Marin County together, the Wisdom Connection. And she and the women there were in an open space of trust and inquiry. I certainly experienced the degree of compassion Teri exuded, and the transition she communicated around her life’s events. That she had recovered from being outside what her life had been was not apparent to me. Traumatic Brain Injury now has volumes of discussion on the internet and in the media, of the recognition, treatment and recovery protocol to be followed. But symptoms of Teri’s injury were not fully realized for weeks. It was her chiropractor who saw the relationship between her symptoms and the car accident. The brain swelling itself came up three days after the accident, but it would be weeks before it was recognized.

That day had started as many had. Her public relations business doing so well that she kept her staff busy all the time.   She was recognized as a super competent, professional businesswoman. She was on her way to a business meeting when she was rear ended at a stop light in Marin County, California.

“I was in the middle of one of my busiest days in my own Interior Design business. I had figured out that if people wanted to change their lives, changing their environment could potentially help them establish and create who they were, and how they were perceived in their community.” That is what Teri did for huge companies, and her private clients who relied on her specifically for her particular approach to the field.

Divorced from her second husband, Teri established herself in her own right, demonstrating exceptional artistic skills in design, marketing, and public relations that ultimately led her to having her own successful firm. She had the life of her choosing, very good compensation, a staff, and had settled into an elegant Marin lifestyle.

That would all end in the blink of an eye one day when she was driving to Fairfax, saw the car in front of her coming to a stop, put on her blinker and slowed to a stop. Then an incredible force shook her as the car behind her was forced into her car, from a third car. Her car and the car behind her were totaled. Still, she walked away, calling her office to have her staff take on the appointment she was missing due to the accident. She intended to get a rental car and go on with her business day, but instead was picked up by a friend who insisted on taking her home as a precaution. The days that followed would accelerate a loss of herself that she couldn’t quite communicate when she visited the doctor.

Teri reported the headaches, and by the next day, her symptoms were worse with loud ear ringing, nausea, and dizziness. She tried to keep up her work from home, but found that if she was on the phone for three minutes working, she had to lay down for three hours. She went to doctors and chiropractors, and with the help of her staff, kept her business going. But her emotions were erratic, and she felt totally exhausted, anxious and angry as time went by. There seemed to be no answer to what was wrong with her.

Friends and Community

Friends wanted to help, but weren’t sure what to offer. In frustration and a growing sense of depression around her condition, she shut down her business.  She could feed and dress her self, but her cognitive skills went downhill. “It was a time when I couldn’t put my thoughts into words,” Teri says. All around her, she had good friends who were interested in, and supportive of her healing, but she was not getting ahead. She seemed to be getting worse. These years were full of a series of disappointments, and some of her friends drifted away from what they could not understand or help.

At her lowest point, Teri took back herself. She withdrew from the world around her, realizing she had to figure out what was next. There were still questions as to what caused the array of symptoms that seemed unrelated to the accident. She took a second look at the possibility of undiagnosed brain damage from the accident; though that consideration had been rejected years ago after the accident. That seemed to have been her first step toward recovery. Teri took on her life again.

After much searching, at a time when the internet was not the quick search tool it is today, Teri found the Brain Tumor Foundation. She called them, described what was going on in her life, and asked for help. “They denied help because I didn’t have a brain tumor. This was a time when there was very little advocacy for brain injuries.” She got reality that her symptoms could indeed be caused by the accident, but that alone did not help her or provide what she needed.

What she truly needed, was provided by her good friend Larry, a massage therapist. Larry had been a witness to what had been happening to her. He brought Teri into his community house to live, instead of her living alone as she had the past two years. Teri credits this step of joining a community for seven years of caring, engaged men and women, as the reason she continued to find her way toward a return to her life. She did this bit by bit, piece by piece, over the next nine years.

A Powerful Truth

Still her anger and sense of betrayal would sometimes dominate her experience; as when she returned to work for an old client, The World Affairs Council. She was forced to face her new limitations. Previously, she had been the person who not only met, but excelled at the challenges of her profession. Now she couldn’t count on herself.  The confusing thing for her and her friends, was that there were times when she could rise to the occasion. Other times her emotions and anger would limit her thinking, and cloud her judgment. This was all the more painful because the medical help she sought did not direct her to the help she needed. There was no medical protocol for dealing with unrecognized traumatic brain injury. This was compounded by the fact that everybody’s brain injury is different. Weeks, months, and years went by.

Teri’s doctors would not give her an MRI. Her doctors and even friends with the best of intentions, were beginning to feel that Teri’s complaints might be psychosomatic. And so it went, until Teri made another direct change in direction. Teri took stock and came up with the recognition of a powerful truth. A truth she attributes, to this day, to her finding the path to full recovery.

Teri had participated very seriously in the EST training in the 1980’s. The level of personal responsibility emphasized there, was her orientation. She began to ask herself the question, “What is the gift in what I am experiencing?”

She began to observe that her response, if directed toward what she could do, rather than what she could not do, not only had her mood improve, but also she could do more, and do it to her satisfaction. When she became annoyed, irritated, angry, it slowed her down and reduced her energy. She began to specifically experience gratitude for everything that was working in her life. The days began to be knitted together; the pieces coming together. Each week that followed was better than the last. Even with the exhaustion of her bank account, the selling of her stock portfolio, and in heavy credit card debt, she kept moving forward.

The Gift

Teri’s eyes are bright as she recounts a big decision she made that brought her life to full value for her. She considered: “I could check out and end it.” For about a week, she considered that her life was too hard, it was never going to get all the way better. “But-” Teri says, “it was then I decided to live.”

Over the nine years, Teri found many healing modalities that added to her progress to what she considers to be a full recovery.  The real gift, Teri says, was the recognition of the self-wisdom and trust she developed, that led her to find the means to rebuild neural passages in her brain, and reconnect with her life fully. Teri offers her story to the many people who are on the confusing and chaotic path to recovery from TMI, searching for a way back from their old lives to their new life that works.

Teri married her husband Robert four years ago. They have an excellent community house, recently traveled to Cuba, Bhutan and have family in Italy where they travel. The foundation of their relationship is an inspiration to friends and their many communities. In their sixties, Teri and Robert live with the sense of wonder at finding each other late in life, and in awe of the experiences that led to their meeting. This includes the years in which Teri rediscovered herself. The wisdom that led Teri to clear herself of the symptoms of TMI is what she offers to people to work with in that circumstance. All brains are unique, and their responses may be different. Each person is on his or her own time line. Through her story, Teri hopes to pass on to others what she has learned. Namely, the nurturing and healing available in an environment of support, as well as the importance of choosing to engage in self discovery and experimentation looking for the increments of progress and healing.

The connection between the brain and mind is of constant focus now in medical and neuroscience. The mysteries of the brain, the mysteries of the patterns of healing that come through how we think and what we feel, is the next paradigm, and ground to be gained for all those, who like Teri, find their way through the integrity of recovery.








Trump’s Election into Office


Trump’s election into Office:  Who are We?  It would be days before I could have an opinion about the results of the election that I witnessed with a group of friends of Donald Trump to be President. Not only that but the Republicans taking the majority in the Senate as well as the House of Representatives was not foreseen. Just like that, all the noise and conflict and screetch that had been in place of discourse for most of the election cycle of what seemed like years and years ended in what didn’t seem possible. How could it be that someone who openly bullied everyone with texts, insulted and spoke with contempt about Republicans as well as Democrats be elected to represent our country. The candidate who, demonstrated religious intolerance, and a 1950’s style bearing dismissed without apology his own sexual assaults that came to light in the campaign, had a strange relationship with Putin and hacking emails, all of this without going down. The mystery of how somehow he kept Democrats on the defense hurling unfounded assertions and threats about with relish did not seem possible.


This particular community of friends, who came together on election eve, had kept their distance from the election process. Only in recent weeks, a few one by one sent out emails and texts asking if the potential of Trump winning the election could really happen. We kept current with Rachel Maddow, Lawrence O’Donald, Saturday Night Live, The Daily Show, and New York Times editorials, so they looked up from their lives and asked out of surprise to the serious threat that seemed to be coming as the election came closer. Daily Kos Polls gave Clinton a 85% chance to win, that only declined to 70% when the FBI once again spread doubt about Clinton and the emails just days before the election. Only the Nate Silver’s poll reported the chance that Trump could win. Each of the people in this room were active in climate change advocates, social justice workers who took their role as citizens seriously, more on the local California level than the national. It was as if this election jerked them into the reality that California is attached to the rest of the country, and ultimately would be impacted by the consequence of this election, but no one was prepared for what felt like the tragic defeat of Democrats washing over us like a storm as we sat huddled in the room together. The full table of food and drinks left untouched as the results came in. One by one people left unable or not wanting to even say goodbye as they slipped away.


People didn’t talk to each other the next day out in the world.   Facebook was all quiet. The New York Times editorials were mild in their response, though just as surprised it seemed as the general public at the outcome. At our house, the cable news went off and it hasn’t been put on again. Like Lemmings we were led down a path and over a cliff. The well dressed and bright new stars who had the microphone and gave out their pronouncements as if they bore some basic truth now were exposed. They were making stories that sold ads on cable. The New York Times and other papers are now willing to say that it was like a hall of mirrors: opinions and attitudes shared within a context where everyone agreed on the same reality had led them down this path, and they had taken the public with them.


OK, so there were more popular votes for Clinton, but the election had been set up on the electoral vote system, and just because we lost didn’t mean we could change the game now in the face of this loss. Were the shoe on the other foot and Clinton having won the electoral, and Trump the popular, the very same people wanting to disqualify the electoral college outcome would have been on the streets in outrage if the situation were reversed.


Rather than having an emotion other than sad dread, I withheld any real response and looked for information around me before having an opinion or taking any action. Once I saw that Trump was elected into office by 53% women voters, and that an estimated 49% of the country didn’t vote, then I had a response. Those were the people who didn’t feel included: as the media and the candidates made assaults and noise, these people didn’t feel that Hillary Clinton offered them what they needed. They were the silent and invisible majority who expressed their no vote to Democrats and Hillary Clinton. For that reason, the anger that began to surface by steadfast and heartbroken Hillary workers though understandable, seemed misplaced. Who are you angry at? The women who did not identify with Hillary Clinton? Or perhaps, the people who turned their backs on the election many of whom had taken the position of the Bernie Sanders supporters, that the flaws of the candidates and the election itself made voting irrelevant, and what was needed was a social revolution.


But if not anger, what was the response to have? My neice from New Jersey, a fierce and courageous young woman wrote that she was afraid the morning after Trump claimed himself the winner of the election. My nephew a brilliant former Eagle Scout, high achieving, successful producer on a news channel in Philadelphia also wrote me saying he was considering cutting off relations with anyone in the family who voted for Trump. Fact is. we have family members who voted for Trump. In recent visits, no one has spoken for or against any candidate but just respected the differences in positions and candidates. But what now?


We had already made Air B&B and airline reservations to DC to see the first woman elected President to take her oath months before, and had been cautious in letting family members know about that. In our minds, we didn’t want to confront them with our glee in the event of her Inaguration. Now we will see our family, and we will deal with whatever comes up to be there. Somehow it seems even more important to be there on January 20th now. My response to my neice and nephew was that this is a time for tribes and families to get together. Compassion will be the order of the day. I hope to see them both when we are there for the Woman’s March in DC on January 21st.


Still being considered is which direction to take. Van Jones started a response to Trump voters and supporters called the Messy Truth. We progressives have all been talking to each other, watching the same cable news, reading the same columns in our newspapers and journals. The way forward may be to go beyond our comfort zone, beyond our understandings and assumptions, and get to know who these people are who voted in Trump.


Arlie Hochschild, retired Professor of Sociology from University of California Berkeley did a study on the Trump supporters in the South in her book “Strangers in Their Own Land: Anger and Mourning on the American Right.” She begins describing the interviews she did in the South scaling what she calls her Empathy Wall,. She suggests that an inquiry must begin with genuine curiosity to understand not only how people think but how they feel toward our country, toward the government, their support of Trump, and about their lives. In a session at the Hillside Club that evening with Joan Blades, Co founder of Momsrising and Founder of MoveON, Hocschild indicated we were going to need to be curious, respectful and look for the common ground getting outside our liberal “bubble.” While Joan supported the idea that through Living Room Conversations, the great divide could be healed in true listening to those holding a different perspective, Arlie held another position.


Arlie drew the audience into an understanding of what she called the “Deep Story.”Dr. Hochschild described how it was for those Trump supporters who were in their own depths of need, shorted in jobs and income to see those who got to be at the head of the line of opportunities and benefits.   Minorities and women who had advantage over hard working blue collar folks represent the class warfare rarely acknowledged. That kind of understanding described by Arlie Hochschild illuminates the basis of the great divide.


Her book about her interviews and study of the Trump Supporters is in her book: “Strangers in Their Own Land:Anger and Mourning on the American Right.” She sees the value of understanding and empathy and common ground as the need going forward, but very vigorously, emphasized the need for the action and stands presented in the social revolution of the 1960’s and 70’s being called on now to keep the social values and human rights gained. Sit Ins, Demonstrations, protests she suggested may be how in fact we go forward with the Republicans in majority in the House and the Senate, with potential of other Conservatives appointed to the Supreme Court justice in the Trump era, as well as the Right wing conservative Cabinet coming into play.


It may very well be we will encounter all manor of needs as described to meet new challenges that lie ahead, indeed a new social revolution may soon be our new world. It may call from all concerned to expand and extend the sense of self in the world, and take on including those who oppose all we have gained in the past decades in social justice and social equality.









The Women’s Caucus-2016: California Democratic Convention


At the Women’s Caucus 2016 of the California Democratic Convention, across the front row facing the podium Nancy Pelosi, Maxine Water, Barbara Lee, Barbara Boxer and Kamala Harris met with delegates in a standing room only gathering of several hundred women with a few men.   These congressional and state public servants have better than stood for the issues of our times, but remarkably in the process they have only gotten softer in the places where humanity needs them to be, and stronger-like steel-in their resolve to see the human beings who are effected by how congress functions.

Each of these office holders is known for  never forgetting that by their unrelenting work for human rights, women’s rights, immigration and education,   communities and families  function are served or not served by  how they perform roles in public office.  They represent the best interest of not only the powerful, but those struggling with racial injustice and mass incarceration.  Women from all over California with standing room only are enthusiastic as these public servants do not keep their distance or strike a pose in their official capacity, but warmly receive the exchanges within the room.   In fact, there is  the impression in the presence of  these House of Representative, Senate and State representatives in that front row,  that the seven and half years of the Obama Presidency has had them taking positions that put them  directly in the firing line of a contempt oriented congress and political atmosphere. But these congressional members have used  all that to get stronger and represent harder the purpose of their  participation in governing.  The appreciation they held for each other in this morning session and for  the half a dozen other representatives from all over the state, who keep going no matter whatever the obstacles to standing for the principles of the democratic party: each person counts, and all persons count.  Democrats, as Vice President Biden stated as he addressed the over 3000 attendees to the Cal Dem Convention later in the day, democrats are for bringing about the possibilities for the value of each person, that no one is left out, while Republicans are trying to limit human rights, women’s rights and voting rights.

California has been ahead of the nation in their response to the needs of people and the ladies in that front row of women who have carried their roles and functions as senators and congressional members had everything to do with that.  One Trailblazer Award was given by the California Democratic Party Women’s Caucus for her dedication to HIV/AIDS legislation, her stand for LBQBT, her work to bring about the relationship with Cuba now opening up and her ongoing work for families and children in her support for social justice for all communities.  Congresswoman Barbara Lee in turn acknowledged Nancy Pelosi for her power to listen and hear above the noise of the senate what is really important to the American people and her ability to inspire collaboration and productive benefit to the people of the country.  She congratulated NARAL for their focus and attention that brought about the repeal of the Hyde Act so that each woman can make a decision for herself about her reproductive rights decisions.

Senator Barbara Boxer, leaving her seat in congress soon, stressed she wasn’t disappearing.  “This is our time,” she said and it is time for a real change and women can make that difference in every field of study and practice. That this is a time when women need to bring other women along with them, and that Secretary of State Hillary Clinton best represents the opportunity for women to fulfill their wisdom and contributions.  “The more doors opened for other women, the stronger we become as a country,” Senator Boxer stated.

“This is our time and we have the right to fight,” Maxine Waters stated and from the response in the room, indicating their choice was to move the progressive  message for the California Democratic Convention that will thread through the next months to the California Primary in June.

California Democratic Convention 2016 delegate votes



2016: This is your new year! Make it happen…


2016: This is your new year!  Make it happen.   As always as the holiday approaches and the crescendo of Christmas is met, there is the lost week between Christmas and the New Year’s that provides a lull, that springs into the New Year’s promise. We each carry a list of potentials we hope for in our work, in our families and within ourselves to bring our lives to the best place possible.  It is possible to use the new year to launch our dreams, renew our promises, confront our limitations, and expand what we think is possible.  That’s what the New Years’ resolutions are all about.  But better than that, is the taking a bigger bite of life, assuming more value for your life and wanting more for the world.

What would that look like in your life?

Here’s my list, I urge you to make your own:

  1. Find a way to respond to the world conditions so  that has you feel more like a participant than an observer, or worse a resigned and annoyed complainer.  There’s plenty to care about:

World hunger; ecological measures that slow global warming; children growing up without invested adults who want to steer them toward a good future; the needs of the Syrian families struggling to survive; those attempting to restart their lives from leaving prison; those alone and at home without community or family support facing serious illness; students allowed to drift and fail in school due to lack of interest and attention, mentoring and tutoring and care.

To each of these, take the resignation that protects you from despair, and find a way to engage.  Thanks to Google, you can find in your community the sources that allow us all to participate and add to what can make a difference in the lives of people.  Finding such an outlet for your energy, that energy that groans when you read the paper or see the sound bite on cable news.  That energy that  is quickly covered with the sense of hopelessness that leads you to resignation can be directed to action and engagement.  This is the promise of the New Year: that we can shift gears, open our eyes and hearts and engage in the world around us; vast and cold as it seems sometimes.

  1. This is a tough one:   Find a way to take this political year with the clamoring, and hyperbole, shouting and impossible assertions, attacks and insults of the candidates that challenges our ability to weed through the noise to find the melody of what democracy is all about. Democracy is noisy, it’s messy and history tells us it’s always been like this.  It just seems a little worse with political grandstands that do not challenge our country’s direction and potential when clearly that is needed.  The issues the world faces with wars raging and countries suffering huge losses of human life and human potential, our sister city Paris recovering from the impossible attack on all we hold dear and essential to our lives, that is where we are.  What we need to hear about is what we as a country are going to do in response to these worldwide conditions, not whose fault it was that they occurred. Which former or current President is responsible for ISIS is a red herring.

What we stand for as a nation is up for debate particularly in the refugee migration.  As we watch Germany and Canada welcome the children and families with warm embrace, where is our voice?  We individually have a responsibility to research, engage and represent in our community our best idea of who we are as a country, and challenge the people we elect locally as well as nationally to represent our country, the one we’re behind.

  1. Another tough one:  across the country very similar to our recent past in the 70’s, a movement in this country is underway in response to the killing of youths of color.  We’re suddenly aware of the mass incarceration of hundreds of thousands, a private prison system supported by us as taxpayers, has been exposed.  Sitting on the sofa watching cable news and having an opinion is better than not taking the trouble to identify this national problem.   Even if we feel the injustice just by looking at the numbers and the causes:  poverty, poor school systems, police in schools and not extra guidance and counseling for students in trouble, etc.-and are looking for answers, we need to look at the faces of those who are affected; the women and children, fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers.   We need to see their faces and recognize this is a human being problem generated systematically over decades and centuries.  From that perspective, we can find a way to meaningfully engage.
  2.  Take a deeper look at what you think you know about the recalcitrant and stubborn positions you yourself hold on the topic of what is happening to people of color in our country.  How many people of color do you get to know personally and intimately enough to know how they feel when they open the newspaper and find our Tamir Rice’s police have been released from the consequences of their actions that killed a young teen with a plastic gun.  You can be an observer or a participant in the ongoing struggle that is underway to unearth assumptions that have never been cleared about the value of all human life to the recognition that we have not functioned as a country as if that were so.  That is why the women who founded Black Lives Matter shook the ground.   It’s a familiar theme when Black Lives Matter women take over a public meeting and the microphone that although their mission is good, how they are doing it is just not right.  Take another look at what is happening there.  Hear the truth of need for the barrier to be broken as well meaning politicians claim they understand the problem;  polite rhetoric and a nod of recognition of racism thrives in denial and ignorance, and pick your place from which to respond to our national tragedy.
  3.  A bigger bite for 2016 could also be taking on your life more fully; better food in your diet, exercise, more intimate relationships with people in your life, taking in the vast and amazing glory of life’s every day potential on. It’s all there to be had.  Maybe from inside out. As we were reminded on our recent trip to the East Coast with family, a bigger bite in life begins with having the courage to open your heart more, leaving the history behind and reaching out investing more of yourself.  That’s living.  That’s the life of challenge and promise.

Happy New Year One and All.


Black Lives Matter: The Social Revolution of our times


Black Lives Matter:  The new social revolution is showing up-led by three feminists- and it is where we need to  see it.  In the gaps, empty promises and pain and injuries and undeniable realities exposed in Ferguson, and across the country in recent months.   Feminists have often led the charge for equity and justice in social reform from the 1920’s onward.  The Civil Rights Bill of 1964 was designed to have race and sex and country of origin not be a limitation to full equality and access to engagement and production in society.  What we see now is  the systematic politically and economically driven obstructions have denied the full application of civil rights through mass incarceration, poor schools, poor healthcare, no early education, racial profiling and a police and criminal justice system that is now being confronted.

Senator Bernie Sanders now running for President has many decades of work for civil rights and human rights.  He says what is wrong with the country can not be changed, it must be transformed.  And that comes from social revolution. A break from the systemic conditions that fill prisons, result in early death and broken hearts is what is required, and that requires not just change but revision coming not from the decay of the missed efforts to civil rights, but a renewal of intention to end the conditions in place and build new opportunity and new hope.  Recently Bernie Sanders had a confrontation with the three feminists who formed Black Lives Matter at a Netroots Nation symposium.  Netroots Nation is highly progressive in their politics and have done a great deal for dismissing the media’s monopoly on how information is giving to the public.  The population has a mixed demography, but is predominantly white, male, college degreed and independent in their political views.  This particular event with Senator Sanders came about because he wanted to talk about the changes he wanted to see in the economic structure that rewards 1% of the population.  Black Lives Matter wanted to talk about life and death, and the death of Sandra Bland which had happened just days before.  Following Freddie Gray, following Michael Brown, and now Sandra Bland there was no room for politics, and Black Lives Matter made that point by interrupting some considered rudely the presentation by Bernie Sanders.  Since revolution is by definition unpredictable, designed to cause the effect that Black Lives Matter created on that stage with Bernie Sanders.  Since Black Lives Matter has indicated that they will not be in the pocket of either Republican or Democrat Presidential candidates.  Now is the time for the killing and imprisonment of young men and women of color to stop, they say.  Now is the time for the empty shell of civil rights to be recognized as having not attained its goal: the incorporation and inclusion of all people, regardless of color, sex or country of origin. Enough, they say.  Enough.

Just as in the 1960’s when revolution made uncomfortable a public that could not turn away from the disparity between what they believed about our country and what they saw in Viet Nam, in the streets of Selma, on the college campuses, there is a demand, an unflinching demand by Black Lives Matter in a confrontation that has just begun.

Gloria Steinem both speak of the necessity of revolution. Karl Marx pointed to the need of “feminine upheaval” as the means to “great social change” and that progress could be measure by where the “ social position of the fair sex.”   Gloria Steinem in the 1970’s argued that reform did not achieve what true revolution does.  She pointed to the visibility of sex and race are “a primary way in which human beings organize around superior and inferior groups.” Humanism she pointed out is really the goal and the means by which feminism brings those changes that add to a better world. For men, for women, for all races. And here we are-about to engage in taking further and going deeper into the hypocrisy and outrage that is just below the surface in every major city of the country.

Revolutions are rude, disruptive and have the intention to interrupt, not change, but transform the conditions limiting human potential.  Co Founders of Black Lives Matter Patrice Cullors, Alicia Garza and Opal Tometi,  began what became a movement after the verdict of the Trayvon Martin, then emerged again as well at the killing of Michael Brown, Eric Garner and Freddie Gray-and Sandra Bland-all black killed by white men.   The District Attorney and Mayor of Baltimore and Black Lives Matter caused the disruption of elected local and state government, by holding them accountable for police agencies assaults and killings of black men ad women.  They stir and demand public awareness and accountability and have through protests gathered a momentum that is now called a movement.

Black Lives Matter is showing up with the message that they want to see black youth presented with opportunities to educate themselves, be trained in job skills and awarded for their youthful enthusiasm and energy rather than left behind and incarcerated . They want to see addiction treated medically rather than the cycle of prison being the only response to those suffering from addiction. While the middle and upper class options of rehab and medical intervention with peer support are available for those with the funds, addiction treated as a criminal offense has only made the offenders, their families and their community loose the value of that person. They want to see the promise of human potential being evenly awarded to this and future generations, they want to see life, liberty and justice awarded to all people.  There is every indication, that Black Lives Matter and those criminal justice advocates who have come together will get this result.  The Presidential Primary and election will be the background and at the forefront of this revolution that is already underway.